2nd Grade Memories...
The biggest summer project at my house this year has been putting my daughter's old school work into memory books. It has been a fun trip down memory lane with one exception.
My youngest daughter's second grade year was by far the most difficult year of parenting for me. This was the year she had hoped would be better as she was placed into the GT program for the first time. This veteran teacher of second grade GT was supposed to understand her.
Unfortunately, this teacher of 2nd grade GT was approaching her retirement years, and was looking forward to easier days. Adding to the fire, second grade coincided with my own education digging deeper in to the "how to" of educating gifted persons. My exceptionally intelligent second grader was picking up on everything I was learning (seriously, I had no idea). She would then use this very correct information to challenge her teacher's methods. Ouch.
"If this is a GT class, why are we watching so many movies?"
"Why do I have to copy that story off the board when I can write my own?"
And after being "punished" for inappropriate class behavior (singing, dancing, creating her own projects)
"I like ISS. I can read uninterrupted in ISS and learn."
And the icing on the cake,
"I need to drop out of school. I learn nothing in school and everything I want to learn I can read in a book."
To which I replied, "You need to learn how to correctly get along with other people."
Ouch again. Still so much more to learn.
I tried to bridge the gap between student and teacher initially, but this veteran teacher of several decades "had seen it all" and "my child would not be any different". That made sense given the decades of experience, so I let it go. I let the professional duke it out--I mean handle it--with the 7 year old.
Then in January I received a long letter from the teacher about how my child was out to get her. Uh, oh. Not much I could do at this point--the respect was gone on both sides--and other than suggest extreme intervention therapy--What could I do? Even the principal had no idea what to do with her...her own words...
Please humor me a moment as I remind you why she was in trouble--singing, dancing, refusing to do mundane work. I was at a loss, so I did nothing--boy would that be different today (just ask!)
Once the other students realized the teacher had pegged my bright one as a "bad kid" they treated her as such. Bullying. Taunting. Teacher would let someone write the names of talkers on the board as she left the room (seriously who does this anymore? She left the room?) and my kiddo's name would go up as soon as teacher left--even before she talked--because they all knew she would. She became the scapegoat. When the teacher asked "Who did this?" about any problem, the answer was my child. My child who was openly defiant if she did not buy into compliance, but never once lied about it--she saw no need to cover up--was labeled now a liar as she angrily denied misplaced allegations. At one point she made a choice she could clearly articulate. "So you think I am a bad kid? I will show you bad kid." At from that point on she did what she wanted.
So yes, that year was a painful trip down memory lane. Most of the worksheets were unfinished. Most of the notes from the other students were nasty. I only saved 9 of the 22 happy birthday notes the teacher required the class to write for each birthday student. I had to throw the rest away because they were so mean--why she even sent them home baffles me. There were absolutely no valentines that year--except for the ones she made up.
But as I am always preaching that we choose our perspective, I will choose to focus on the positives. This is the year where she started her own publishing company (complete with a logo--see above) and wrote several books. She learned to self stimulate her mind (even if it got her in trouble). While these stories were not the sanctioned assignments of the day--they are pretty amazing. This girl can write! So in some ways her most painful year was also her most creative year.
We still have conversations about those days in second grade. Conversations that I am hoping allow her to grow and learn to relate to others who really don't get her, despite how much they "should".
And she went on to third grade to a newly hired teacher who really did "get it" with the whole GT thing. Restoring my bright ones confidence in formal education.
And she did learn how to self advocate correctly, and has blazed many trails for those who come through the system behind her. She is now entering high school with sophomore credits (minus one), and has begun to finally enjoy some of the social aspects of school. So much so that she made the decision to take a "full" three years to graduate high school rather than push herself to do it in two--here's hoping this is the right choice!
